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  • athomp9

How To Not BLOW UP Your Marriage



“For some reason, I can’t seem to get any breakthrough in my finances. I feel stuck, and nothing seems to be working.”


A client recently shared his frustrations with me. He is a successful businessman. He is an educated businessman. He is a Christian.


(If you are a woman, this is a good email to read to understand your partner’s perspective).


In my 42 years on Earth, I’ve realized nothing is ever as it seems.


When I look out my window and see a cactus shriveled up and nearly dead, I know it’s not because there is too much sun, but rather a lack of nutrients below.


Your physical body is the same way.


When you experience outward symptoms of sickness, it’s due to an inner battle. Your body is doing everything it can to defeat the sickness, but it cannot, and thus you feel sick or whatever the illness may be.


When this man came to me in frustration over his finances and business, I knew we needed to look much deeper. Especially, since he was telling me he was a follower of Christ.


When I dug deeper into his story, infidelity was revealed which resulted in a lack of trust in his partner. His mind was wandering, and lusting toward other women.


The Bible is about order.


Genesis 1 reveals the methods of God’s creation, and it was all done in order. There is an entire book of Numbers in the Bible. Order is significant.


Most high-level leaders focus on money and business. They know God comes first and their family is important, but their schedule doesn’t reveal that.


Where you put your time determines what you value most.


Where you put your money determines what you value most.


Where you put your energy determines what you value most.


If you are wondering why things are not working the way that you desire, you need to audit your time, talent, and treasure.


Getting the order right will open up opportunities.


Men, let me give you a quick reminder of what God tells you regarding your wife. I’m sharing this with you because I failed miserably at this. But, once I got this right, everything shifted in a BIG WAY.


I thought I was doing everything right, but I was missing this HUGE component. I had the order wrong, and it was costing me BIG TIME.


Let me repeat that, “I failed miserably.”


Ephesians 5:23-25 says, “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, …


When I read this verse, it is a gigantic mirror to reflect upon. For most of my life, I knew this verse, but rarely APPLIED this verse.


What does the application of this verse look like for me?


The best way I can explain it is to reference world-renowned marriage researcher John Gottman.


The Gottman Institute has interviewed thousands of marriages to determine what destroys a marriage. And by destroying a marriage you are destroying a Biblical blessing.


Proverbs says, “He who finds a wife, finds a good thing and receives favor from the Lord.”


Isaiah 1:19 says, “If you are willing and obedient, you will eat the best of the land.”


Let me share what the Gottman Institute says you must avoid to enjoy an abundant marriage.

  1. Avoid criticism. It will kill your marriage.

  2. Avoid contempt. This is the most deadly for marriage.

  3. Avoid defensiveness.

  4. Avoid stonewalling


This is the part where you need to take some deep breaths and reflect on where you are at and where you want to be.


Where does God, family, and business fall in order of importance to you?


If they are out of order, what will you do?


If they are out of order, when will you start to organize them the right way?


Do you need to repent to your partner?


Do you need to repent to God?


If you are looking to increase revenue, time, influence, and peace, be sure to reflect upon the order of God, relationships, and your business.


How you do anything, is how you do everything.


God is not looking for left overs. He clearly says, “No other gods before me.”


Let that sink in.


I’m rooting for you.

I’m praying with you.


God bless.

Anthony Thompson *I recently updated a working document for new and existing clients. If you are interested in coaching, or to learn more about my story and process, check out this document.


**If you are serious about getting through this season, and you want to talk about what that could look like, let me know. I have one or two openings for new clients who want to invest in their greatness.


***For business owners needing help, let me know. I’d love to learn more about what you are working on and your goals. This could look more like an advisor for you to increase revenue, time, influence, and peace.


Plus, whenever you are ready - here are 5 more ways you can grow in spirit, soul, mind, and body.

  1. My latest devotional, Think and Grow Wise on Youversion

  2. 1-1 Coaching with me. (Think partnership, trusted advisor)



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